There is only one way to know someone and that is through time. Many people think that if you substitute the time you would spend with someone over a year of knowing them and squeeze that time into a 24/7 relationship, then you will get the same results.Very often there is an inappropriate pacing in relationships in which people early on begin to spend 24/7 with a new person.A woman’s capacity to choose differently is only as effective as the information she has to choose wisely.
While the violent man is indeed one of the categories of dangerous men, there are seven others that are often overlooked.
Our research indicated that 100% of women understand red flags, have red flags, and many of them go on to ignore the very red flags that can alert them to unsafe relationships.
Women sited various reasons for ignoring red flags which included societal training that women should be polite, gender differences that taught them that women are to be hyper-tolerant to less than appealing male behavior, and female role modeling in their childhoods where women in their families tolerated dangerous male behavior, renamed the behavior to something less threatening, and then stayed.
No wonder we have confused technology speed with relational speed. The problem is that there is no way to rush intimacy.
Speed dating does not = relationship security and knowledge.
And furthermore, they do not know what ‘an inability to grow or change’ looks like or acts like.